I Remember;

I remember seeing that Facebook add;
Shawn Larkin

I remember the first day my eyes met his and that feeling I had in my heart.
Laughing like we knew each other forever.
Hoping that he would still talk to me after the first time hanging out.

I remember getting that text as I walked into my house;
"I can't wait to be with you again". and thinking how on earth a girl like me could be around a guy like him.

I remember asking him to the Christmas dance my Junior Year because my parents wouldn't let me take the guy I originally asked. Wrapping up Mt. Dew and going to a family party with Santa. Shawn sitting on Santa's lap and opening the Mt. Dew and it said "Will you Dew me the favor and go to the Christmas Dance with me?"

Who would of thought that was one of the best decisions of my entire life.

I remember the day activity, walking around Temple Square in Salt Lake City and standing by that garbage can. Super romantic as he pulled me in and kissed me for the first time. I remember those butterflies because I still get them everytime I kiss him. Everytime.

I remember praying about the decision if I should continue dating Shawn or not. I remember how powerful that feeling was that I should. I remember Shawn working for it every single day. Proving how much he cares about me and wanting it to be official.

I remember going to Arizona to see my cousins and missing him SO much. That's when I knew I wanted to be his girl.

I remember January 24, 2010. Shawn picked me up and told me to close my eyes. We were driving in his truck and I couldn't stop laughing. I remember the truck stopping and Shawn said open your eyes. And right in front of me was a fence. In that fence were red cups.

WILL U B MY GIRLFRIEND?

I remember every up and down moment we ever had. I remember how strong we were for just being in highschool.

I remember the day he told me he loved me.
I was 16. He was 17. But it was real. and it is still real.
He told me after work one day. We sat in my car and he looked me in the eyes and said,
"Emily. I love you. I'm in love with you."
And I knew I could say it back because I felt the same way about him.

I remember that he changed my life. He made me a better person, a better friend to others, a better sibling, a better example to my peers. He helped me make and reach goals. I remember going to his prom, his graduation, I remember him coming to my prom and my graduation.

I remember every family party. Every heart-to-heart conversation.
He would pick me up every other day for lunch while I was still in highschool. I remember he would surprise me at work and then get kicked out because it wasn't aloud. He taught me how to ride a dirt bike. I remember seeing him play with kids for the first time and knowing he was going to be an amazing father one day.

I remember
(tears start now)
the day he told me he submitted his mission papers. I remember every emotion of that day. I remember us crying in his car because he was scared to pray about me in the temple because he didn't want the answer to be a NO.

I remember going to the temple in Salt Lake City,  waiting for him to come out. As he walked out, he picked me up off the floor and swung me around. He told me about the prayer he said in the Celestial Room and that it was so powerful and strong that the answer to marry me and for me to wait for him was a Yes. I remember praying about it as well and having the most powerful answer.

I remember crying with him a couple days before he left. No words were spoken.
We ugly cried together. It was terrible. haha. But I remember it and that pain is still there when I think about it. I remember holding him in the back seat of his truck and we just cried and cried. We were so scared what the future was going to hold and to lose each other.
I remember saying goodbye to him for 2 years.
I remember driving around in my car on hard days and just crying. Driving to our spots and just praying for strength.
I remember every excitement about a letter or email from him.

I remember every tear, every heartbreak, every sleepless night, every hard moment i had while he was gone.

I remember saying " I can't wait to be engaged " or " It feels like forever until we're married ". or "You're never coming home"

And look where we are now.
I remember hugging him in the airport and saying, I will marry him- to my best friend.
I remember the first time he held my hand after 2 years in the car. and the first kiss after 2 years.

I remember wanting to be his fiance so bad.
And now I am. He proposed at temple square. by our temple. The Salt Lake Temple. 
I get to marry my high school sweetheart.

Tonight, as I was cuddling with him on his couch, one of his mission buddies texted him. They haven't talked since Shawn got home from the mission and he said, "Dude how's Emily?" and Shawn replied, "She's awesome. I proposed 2 days ago". and it took my breath away for a second because that very moment the thought that came to my mind was, Wow. Shawn talked about me while he was on his MISSION. and now i'm his fiance.

And we cuddled all night. He's sick, so I've been taking care of him. He laid his head on my shoulder and I looked down at my ring and tears came to my eyes because I can't believe after all this time, I'm finally going to be his bride. People keep telling me "Oh Shawn is so lucky to have you". But really, I'm so lucky to have him. He's incredible and I can't wait to have him sealed to me forever. I loved taking care of my sick boy with a ring on my finger. We've always talked about being married but now it feels more official.

And as I was driving home, I thought Wow. This is happening. It still amazes me that I waited for him. And that was easily the best decision I ever made.
Because now I get to marry the man of my dreams. Today I went dress shopping and as I looked at myself in the mirror in THE dress, I cried. Because it was like every hard moment I ever had with waiting for him and waiting to marry him for 3 years, it was like it all left my body and I cried because I finally get to do what I've wanted so bad. I get to be HIS bride.

And I can't wait to be cuddling him after the wedding and saying,

"I remember planning a wedding, and now look where we are".

I can't wait for all the "I remember's" with him.