If coming home wasn't hard enough.

If coming home wasn't hard enough,

the Lord is really giving Shawn a trial.

He comes home for a month;

has a 4 hour delay in LA;

misses his flight in Santiago

therefor he has to figure out new flight plans

IN SPANISH

for six hours;

gets on a plane and arrives in Concepcion

and his bags are stolen.

Paragraph from email:

No the duffle bag that i took down to chile i didnt loose, right when
i got of the plane and then met up with the senior missionaries here
they told my that last night the stupid office elders took my
suitcases to take to my house the night before i got here, and they
went and parked on a bad part of town in concepcion to do contacting
and someone broke out the window and took all my stuff. Everything, i
mean everything, pictures of you, christmas packages, the 7
months worth of letters, all my coats, suits, shoes, books, etc. Its
been hard week. I have had to go shop to replace things, all my
clothes, shaving razor, my paresnts are sending me suit case down the
end of this week with another supply of contacts and rain gear and
coats and stuff. LIke my life has sucked. I dont even know how I've
functioned honestly, i was so pissed holy crap, still am. 

Everything is gone.

7 months worth of everything.

And it bothers me so much to know

some heartless Chilean has MY letters,

MY pictures,

the CHRISTMAS package I sent him,

just everything.

I'm furious.

I can't believe Shawn has to go thru all this.

But I sent him super positive emails.

Shawn is amazing

and he is capable of anything.

He can conquer the impossible

and I'll be by his side thru it all.

I'm sending him a package full of things to replace.

Everything I've gotten him while on his mission

I am re-buying and sending it to him.

I know how much it means to him

and I will do everything I can to make him happy.

His happiness means the world to me.

and he needs a boost to get out there and serve.

Its hard.

What he is going thru is very hard

and no missionary should have to deal with this much

but the Lord knows what he is doing.

Maybe he is putting him thru these trials

so later down the road when he is going thru HARDER things

he will look back on this and know that he can

overcome anything.

I'm so proud of him.

I'm proud of his decision to stick it out and serve.

He's amazing.

I've got myself a GREAT guy

and I'm not letting go of him.

He's mine forever!

I love him so much.

And even though he can't read this right now...

I love you Shawn

and I'm so extremely proud of you.

I know what you are going thru is so hard,

but I'll be by yourside thru it all

and help you with everything you need.

You've got so many people praying for you.

I believe in miracles and I know something

special is coming your way.

Smile, because I love your smile.

and I know that you will get thru this

with a smile on your face.

Its hard to be positive about this situation he is in.

But I'll be positive because he needs me.

I love you Shawn, sooooo much!!! 

Never too early

Here I am.

On a Saturday afternoon.

Most teenagers would be out with friends;

going to a party;

doing what teenagers do.

Me?

Nahh. I'd rather sit on pinterest

and plan my wedding.

Everyone is getting married.

Its so exciting and I love that my friends have

found their someone.

But of course I'm sad

because my someone happens to be 6000 miles away

and the big day isnt even until next year!

But boy oh boy am I excited.

And I know he is as excited as I am!

Here are a few of my cute ideas for my dream wedding.

Heck, since a girl waits for two years

she should get the wedding of her dreams.

Never too early to start planning :)

My hair will be down and curled. Something like this.

I want these on tables, and on path.

There WILL be a picture with our rings in our letters.

Shawny will be in this light grey suit and the boys will

be in dark suits with light pink ties

Good thing I know all of our dates :)

Lace sleeves is a must!

I love the INFINITY band. means eternity :)

Good thing my boys dad is the fire cheif :) Im going to get an ok

for floating lanterns at my wedding.

My wedding will be based on the fact that i waited for him

so a mailbox is perfect.

These shoes are soooo freakin cute.

My colors?

Pink

Ivory

Grey

I cant wait for my wedding!!!

I love you Shawn!!!!



the month that made us stronger.

The title of this blog says enough.

December 1-January 10

have been the hardest month of our lives.

To those who have no idea whats going on

Shawn came home December 1.

He was in a lot of pain down in Chile

and they found out that he had a hernia.

The doctors and mission pres decided that the surgery

needed to be done in America because of how intense it was.

So Shawn came home on a wednesday and that Monday

he had surgery.

He was in so much pain.

He has never been in so much pain

Shawn was never ever one to complain but it was awful.

He didn't feel comfortable walking for about 2 weeks.

It got better, but if he walked too much, he would

be in so much pain and need to lay down.

So time went on

and everywhere we went, we would look for each other.

I saw him driving 3 times.

Christmas was horrible with out him.

but man, do I love him a million times more than I did before.

We learend a lot this past month;

about ourselves,

about each other,

about our relationship;

we are a million times more in love.

Now another thing;

it's no longer see ya in 2 years!

Its see ya NEXT YEAR!

I cant believe that NEXT SUMMER

Shawn will be all mine!

Man oh man,

Time.

Lets speed up!

Kick BUTT Shawn! Make me proud!

You're not leaving me for two years to let me down!

I know that you are amazing and the Lord has so much in store

for you the next 17 months.

And dont worry,

I'll be here thru the whole process and when you get home.

I promise.

I love you Shawny!!!

515 Days til he's home!

I wont give up.

I  love music.

I love everything about music;

the lyrics,

the beat,

the tone it sets,

the way it will touch a soul.

I came across this song,

and it brought tears to my eyes.

It is perfect.

But perfect is an understatement.

I love that the lyrics are on letters.

Enjoy!

Seriously :)

Lyrics:

When I look into your eyes
It's like watching the night sky
Or a beautiful sunrise
There's so much they holdAnd just like them old stars
I see that you've come so far
To be right where you areHow old is your soul?

I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up
And when you're needing your space
To do some navigating
I'll be here patiently waitingTo see what you find

'Cause even the stars they burn
Some even fall to the earth
We've got a lot to learn
God knows we're worth itNo, I won't give up

I don't wanna be someone who walks away so easily
I'm here to stay and make the difference that I can makeOur differences they do a lot to teach us how to use
The tools and gifts we got yeah, we got a lot at stake
And in the end, you're still my friend at least we did intend
For us to work we didn't break, we didn't burn
We had to learn how to bend without the world caving in
I had to learn what I've got, and what I'm not
And who I am
[I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up
Still looking up.]
I won't give up on us (no I'm not giving up)
God knows I'm tough enough (I am tough, I am loved)
We've got a lot to learn (we're alive, we are loved)
God knows we're worth it (and we're worth it)
I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up

I wont give up on us babe.

You have my promise.

I love you.



i will make you proud.

I thought of you today,

but that is nothing new.

I thought about you yesterday,

and days before that too.

I think of you in silence,

I often speak your name.

All i have are memories

and a picture in a frame.

Your memory is a keepsake,

 from which I'll never part.

God has you in his arms.

I have you in my heart

I'm in love.

I'm in love with my missionary.

I am so proud of him for serving the Lord

and for being who he is!

Being home isn't easy;

But I am so proud of him for going back out.

He will be here for another week,

but he'll be ready to go back out there;

kick butt; make me proud; make his family proud;

and make the Lord proud.

In the mean time.

I have a goal to better myself for him

and for the Lord.

I'm going to go to the temple once a week.

and read my scriptures every night.

Shawn is growing so much

and I need to be at his level when he comes home.

He makes me  proud;

I will make him proud.

I'm the luckiest girl in the world everyone.

Believe me.

I love that boy with all my heart.

Words wont even do any justice to explain

how grateful I am;

how much I love him;

and how lucky I am.

521 Days until he is home in my arms.

2012-

Happy New Years Everyone!

First I want to say

what a wonderful year 2011 was.

Graduated High School,

Fell more in love with Shawn,

Helped him prepare for his mission,

Sent him off on his mission,

Grew closer to my heavenly father,

started Hair School,

made new friends,

found great support,

got 2 tickets,

went sky diving,

found my new addiction (diet coke),

Started scrapbooking,

found the best job in the world,

went to Vegas,

went to Disneyland,

was on TV for a concert,

and so much more.

All together,

2011 was a great year.

I've learned so much

and I have so much to be grateful.

Now lets hope 2012

will be just a good as 2011.

I'm scared to face 2012.

So many things will happen.

Its my first FULL year without Shawn

since we met.

I'm not looking forward to it.

But I look forward to 2013

and in order to get there,

we need to accomplish 2012.

So what are my goals for the new year?

-Read the Book of Mormon

-Save money. lots of money

-Graduate Hair School

-Find a good job doing hair

-Get enrolled in a College

-Be the best girlfriend ever to Shawn

(Gosh, I love him)

-Go to the temple once a week

-Be a nicer person

-Make more friends

-Re-do my bedroom

-Scrapbook Shawn's mission

-Be more organized and clean

There are probably more things to the list

but for the most part,

those are the major things I want to accomplish.

And I will.

The New Year already started with a bang.

I'm just hoping this new year goes by fast.

2013 can't get here soon enough.

I love you Shawn.

I'll see you next year!!!

Here are some new pictures of

me and some of the beautiful MG's.

We went to Temple Square New Years Eve!

It was so much fun!

Love you ladies!



Christmas

Christmas 2011

What a day.

Waking up at 5:20

because the little brothers were so excited;

getting everything I wanted;

A laptop, cute jewlery, clothes, stuff about my mishh;

and of course

Shawny's Package.

That was so fun to open!

He spoiled me!

Chile bag, B.O.M. in spanish, Chilean money, pass along cards in

spanish, a change carrier, and those two name tags!

Both of these were hand made.

Spiderman hat, and freakin sick jacket.

He knows me so well!!!

But of course..

this is what means the most to me.

He wore this.

I love thinking that.

He walks around everyday with the Lords name on his badge.

I am so proud of my boyy.

He is amazing.

Thanks you so much babe for that amazing

Christmas Package.

The rest of the day went something like this.

Falling asleep in church;

eating lots of food;

party at the Lambs house;

got my favorite lotion;

Went home and enjoyed another family party

with my dads side;

and while all this was going on..

i was waiting for one text.

one text that would either make me very happy

or crush my world.

Lets see if you can guess what it was..

Shawn's mom told me to drop off the presents on the porch.

It hurt.

All I wanted was my Christmas Wish.

All I wanted was to see him on Christmas.

Everyone else got to either talk or skype with

their missionaries on Christmas

and mine just so happens to be down the street

and I couldn't even watch him open his presents.

I couldn't help but start to cry.

I then went to drop off the presents at their house.

I got Shawn 2 really nice shirts for Pday

and I made him a necklace with E<3 on it.

its manly, dont worry.

and I made his parents a sign that said

"Mis-sion-ary: Someone who leaves their family

for a short time, so others will be with their families for

eternity"

I then got a very sweet text from her

telling me how much she loved the present

and how much Shawn loved his!

But I'm still very sad over the fact that

its Christmas..

and I couldn't see him.

It was a very good day, and I have a lot to be grateful for

but this would of only made it the best christmas ever.

I miss him so much.

I was looking thru old photos

and these were the pictures taken last year at this time.

I love you babe.

Then for the rest of the night

I just enjoyed being with my whole fam

watching Christmas Vacation.

Time to hit the sack.

Merry Christmas Everyone.

Merry Christmas Shawn.

I love you.



Christmas when you were mine.

This sums up how I'm feeling right now.

I love you Shawny. More than you will ever know.

We can do this;

We have to.

We'll be together soon

and we will never be apart on Christmas again.

<3

but for me its just a lonely time

cuz there were Christmases when you were mine.



Not easy.

His surgery went very well.

But it was more intense than planned.

I guess he has had a hernia his whole life

and never knew about it.

So there was more digging, more stitching;

and he is in so much pain.

It took him two weeks to finally feel comfortable.

He was supposed to go back

December 16.

But there was just no way.

Poor guy can't even move,

you think he'd be okay to go out and serve his mission again?

I dont think so.

So looks like he'll be home for Christmas

and New Years.

Yay me.

Sarcasm?

Yes!

Because this is the time of year that we love

and spend every minute together

and we can't.

BUT

part of me really is happy he is home.

1. I'd rather have him recover here than Chile

2. I have to only do one Christmas without him

not two;

even though we aren't "really" together,

its nice to know he is so close :)

And lets just hope I get a miracle this Christmas to see him.

Other than that,

you guessed it;

I haven't seen him yet.

Its the hardest thing I have ever done.

I'm just waiting for the day that I run into him somewhere.

In fact, I did pass him last week while driving.

He was in his Grandma's car.

For a second, I couldn't believe that was him.

I thought I was seeing things;

til my sister reassured me that it was Shawn.

Then I had a mini heart attack as he smiled at me when I drove by.

I love him.

We email Mondays

and he just sent me some pictures from his mission.

^Men Working

I love him.

He is SUCH a stud!

My heart melts everytime I see a picture of him!

534 Days babe.



Battle we're fighting.

"I might not get to see you as often as I'd like, I may not get to hold you in my arms at night, but deep in my heart I know that it's true. No matter what happens... I will always love you"

You think being 6000 miles

away from someone is hard?

Try being less than 5 minutes away

and not being together.

I am now facing the hardest obstacle in my life.

But because of this trial,

I somehow feel closer to Shawn than I have ever felt.

Even though this straight up sucks

and this wasn't part of the plan

I am a firm believer that

everything happens for a reason.

And maybe there is a big reason this all happened

and we wont know about it til' later;

maybe he needed to touch someone's life here;

maybe he needed to get away from Chile

because something was going to happen;

and of course doctors are better here,

but if anything,

this trial has brought us closer together

and I love him more than I did yesterday.

and I will love him more tomorrow than I did today.

And during the last couple of days

I have learned something.

Nothing will take me away from Shawn.

I have felt his love more the last couple days

than I have ever felt.

He's worth the wait everyone.

and even though we are going through

something that is miserable;

'our love can conquer anything.' - Shawn.

What I have with him is worth it.

It is worth every lonely night, every tear I cry from missing him,

and the pain I feel from not having him close.

It is worth it because he is my one and only.

When I picture myself years from now, I see only him.

No matter how painful distance can be,

not having him in my life would be worse.

"Not being able to hold you has got to be the hardest thing I've ever had to do. But I get to look forward to the next time you are in my arms; your smile only inches away from mine getting closer and closer until at last... our smiles meet. Something that beautiful... that's what keeps me going"